young girl

Bloody Server Installed

We installed the first of our new servers today. Instead of the traditional ‘blog-style’ write-up, we live tweeted. This is an after-action report (AAR) on the bloody trail that leads directly to our new server.

It began at the end of April, when we received a kind donation from a Swiss mountaineer.


Today we went to collect. It did not go strictly to plan, but these things never do. Which is why we don’t waste too much time making plans for that that we could just be getting on with. Office workers makes plans. They spend all day planning, then they go home and wonder why nothing ever gets done.

We’re on our way back with the server, then this shit happen:

car blew up

We wait about an hour for the tow-truck. He couldn’t find us. We were on top of one of the foothills of the Alps, with a nice view across the snow-capped peaks while we waited, the sun was shining, we were high af, so we didn’t mind.

Triangulating on an Ambulance

The repairman only spoke Swiss German so giving him directions to the pick-up was complicated. As luck would have it I heard an ambulance coming, then heard it’s sirens coming out of the phone while speaking to him, so we’re able to triangulate and get a fix.

Who needs GPS, we thought. Had to get towed the last mile. Downhill, and all. Just to rub it in.

Worse was to come.

Bloody Trail

With the server safely in the basement, it was time to attach cables and go for power up. As she booted, we noticed something odd:

bloody trail leads direct to

A trail of blood leading directly to the server farm. A quick inspection showed that I’d cut my foot. On the racking edge, which had a chunk of skin stuck to it (not shown, graphic).

As the blood spurted across the datacenter floor, the server continued it’s boot-up and power-on self-test the fans screaming like one of Vladimir Putin’s fighter-jets. Apart from the foot, all seemed fine.

Thirty minutes later we’ve re-partitioned the RAIDs, installed Ubuntu server, configured the network and she’s online.

Baptised in Blood

We name all the hosts in this subnet after mountains, and as this one spilled blood during her first boot-strap what better a name than (Which we redirect back to our homepage for now, to save her 503 blushes until she’s got her middleware on).

We putting some respek on her name.

As for the webmaster’s cut foot? Here’s a picture of him looking like he gives af.

put some respeck on my name

Is we finished, or is we done?

We only just started.

Eiger-Mönch-Jungfrau (uncredited public domain)
Birdman – The Breakfast Club (capped)
All other images are belong to us.