Hope and Change – Six Years In

A short update on the progress towards a better world thus far.


President Obama makes quenelle during inauguration
Promise: Shutdown Guantanamo
Status: Guantanamo still open
Progress: 0%

Promise: End War in Iraq
Status: War in Iraq ended, new war in Iraq in its opening stages
Progress: 100% + (-100%) = 0%

Promise: End torture
Status: Some folks tortured
Progress: 0%

Promise: Reform healthcare
Status: Partially implemented, likely to be overturned soon after mid-terms.
Progress: 50%

Promise: Final Solution of the Race Problem
Status: Trayvon. Ferguson.
Progress: 0%

Promise: Reset relations with Russia
Status: USA-Russia on brink of nuclear war
Progress: 100%

Promise: Accountability
Status: Truthtellers persecuted to the ends of the Earth, self-serving war-mongers and fraudulent finance richly rewarded.
Progress: 0%

Promise: Protect Environment
Status: Fracking rocks
Progress: 0%

Promise: End War on Terror
Status: OBL dead. Islamic State declared initial population: 6,000,000
Progress: 0%

War Score
Lybia: +1
Syria: +1
Gaza: +2
Ukraine: +1
Other Africa: +1
Iraq: Level III Upgrade

NB: We use the word ‘promise’ in the political sense of ‘whatever the schmuck voter wants to hear’. It’s not to be taken literally.

 

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